


Impostor Syndrome

by seatea



Category: Among Us (Video Game)
Genre: Alien Crewmate(s) (Among Us), Angst, Betrayal, Blue and Lime are nonbinary, Canon-Typical Violence, Enemies to Lovers, Human Impostor(s) (Among Us), Impostor White (Among Us), Lovers To Enemies, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, White has PTSD, i don't know how spaceships work and i'm not afraid to show it, they are aliens not parasites
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-12 02:54:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29502999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seatea/pseuds/seatea
Summary: After a ship crash, White wakes up on a Skeld that is different from the one she remembers. When you're the only human among alien doppelgängers, the only option for survival is to be the last one alive.
Relationships: Blue/White (Among Us), Crewmate/Impostor (Among Us), Red/White (Among Us)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 53





	1. Prologue

_Alarms were blaring, and the entirety of the Skeld was flooded with an angry red glow._

_White scrambled around Navigation, frantically pressing buttons. Others were shouting down the hall, their voices bouncing on the metal walls and mixing with the shrieking alarms in a disorienting cacophony. White was going to throw up._

_She slammed her fist on a giant, important looking button. “Please, please, please,” she murmured to herself. The sonar dial on the dashboard pinged loudly, indicating that whatever the Skeld was approaching, neither were slowing down. White couldn’t redirect them. She couldn’t even find the breaks._

We’re going to crash.

_As soon as the thought hit her head, the Skeld crunched forward, pitching White off of the ground and towards the Navigation window. The last thing she saw was the room turn blood red before her back hit the glass window with a crack, and everything went black._

* * *

When White blinked her eyes open, she was staring at the metal plating of the Medbay’s ceiling. The edge of her vision was blurred as she sat up, and her hand instinctively reached for her head as a dull pain pounded through her skull. She could hear her heartbeat in her helmet as she shook the fuzz out of her thoughts.

“What… what happened?”

“Oh, thank the stars you’re okay.”

White turned her head slowly to see the giant, royal blue sphere of an astronaut’s helmet.

“You flew out of the ship during the collision,” Blue said, rubbing their helmet absentmindedly as if caressing their cheek through the polycarbonate. “I was so worried. We managed to reel you in before you drifted too far, but you were out cold. I thought we might have lost you.”

White blinked. Blue never particularly cared for her before, no more than the other strangers she was shipped off with. _But near death experiences do change a person_ , she supposed.

The patter of footsteps echoed through the hall, and Blue and White turned to see Orange careening into the room. “Lime and I just finished surveying the reactor, everything seems oka- oh, White, you’re up.” She straightened and cupped her hands around her helmet window about where her mouth would be, as if it would make a difference, and hollered, “HEY EVERYBODY, WHITE IS UP!”

And suddenly, the room was flooded with color. Rainbow astronauts crammed themselves through the door of the Medbay behind Orange, all straining to get a look.

“White!” a voice called, and Red shoved his way through the throng of crewmates. He scooped her up in a rib-crushing bear hug. “Oh, we’re so glad you’re okay!”

All White managed to croak out was a weak “Wh-what?” before Blue tugged her out of Red’s death grip.

“Gentle on her!” Blue said. “She just got launched into space, she doesn’t need your killer hugs to do additional damage.”

Red gave a hearty chuckle, a sound White had never heard from him before. “Fair, fair.” Instead of a hug, he approached and gave her a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. “I’m glad you’re okay, White.”

Blue gave White a loving but soft hug. “We all are.”

White’s head was spinning. Red, laughing and hugging and being nice? The Red that she remembered was the cold leader of the Skeld, who had never said a nice thing about anyone, let alone a newbie crewmate like White. 

And Blue was a whole other story. White had thought that Blue was sweet and kind of cute for a while now, but she didn’t even think that they knew she existed. Blue had never once spoken to her, but now she was acting like she cared a lot. _What is happening?_ It was almost as if everyone transplanted new personalities during the crash. _I must have hit my head harder than I thought_ , White thought.

Orange piped up, breaking White out of her thoughts. “It’s lovely that everyone is whole and well and all that, but what about the crash? Were you able to find anything out about what we hit, Red?”

Red rubbed his helmet sheepishly. “Not yet. I’ve doubled back our course to see if we can find the remains of whatever it was, but things are slow going during repairs. Also, just a note, we may have an air leak, so space suits are to stay on twenty-four/seven, got it?” He stared pointedly. “And speaking of repairs…” Red turned to face the gallery of rainbow astronauts still crammed in the Medbay door. “Don’t you all have work to be doing?”

The room immediately cleared as everyone scattered, and Red let out a low chuckle. White couldn’t keep my eyes off of him as Blue eased her back into the bed. 

When White had first been assigned to work aboard the Skeld, the thing that terrified her the most was Red. He was known throughout MIRA, the world leaders in space exploration and who White had trained with for the past three years, as the harshest space captain on payroll. He ran his ships with an iron fist, and when White learned that her very first mission into space would be under him, she nearly passed out. Yet here he was, joking around with the crew and genuinely worrying about their well-being. He was nothing like the stories.

“Rest up,” Red said.

White could only nod numbly as he walked away.

“Is he always this way?” she asked after a minute to Blue, who was bustling about the medbay doing something medical and important.

Blue looked over their shoulder. “Who, Red? I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

”You know... nice?”

Blue chuckled. “Of course. You should know that better than anyone.”

White felt her face go red. “Wh-what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Okaaay, we can play dumb,” Blue teased, leaving several implications that White wasn’t sure she was comfortable with. “Anyway, why wouldn’t he be? Nice, I mean. He’s our leader, it’s his job to care about us.” They shook their head incredulously and came over to White’s bed. “Why do you ask? Do I need to check your head again? Take your temperature?”

”No,” White sighed, settling into bed. “I’m going to get some rest. I want to be able to help with repairs tomorrow.” 

“Okay, get some sleep,” Blue said, a kind smile audible in their voice. As White turned to face towards the wall, she heard Blue’s feet shift, then a hand settled on her arm. A light squeeze, and then Blue was gone. 

White felt her face flush, and, after settling into a position as comfortable as laying in bed in a full astronaut suit could be, she fell into a fitful sleep. 

* * *

White woke up groggy and still feeling exhausted, despite Blue cheerfully telling her that she had been asleep for fifteen hours. Her neck was killing her from sleeping in a helmet, and she felt stiff all over, but she stumbled out of bed and made her way to the Cafeteria anyway, Blue accompanying her with their arm hooked around hers. 

When they entered the Cafeteria, a sea of rainbow immediately jumped up to embrace her and usher her over to one of the sticky plastic tables. Apparently she arrived just in time for breakfast.

After a dull meal of freeze-dried space food that White was feeling too nauseous to try, everyone dispersed to complete various maintenance tasks. Apparently, the ship got really banged up in the crash, so much so that they identified several air leaks and all of the machinery kept blipping in and out unexpectedly. The ship was moving at a snail’s pace backwards to where the crash took place, with Red hoping that if they could identify what they hit, once communications to HQ were back up, it could prove useful. For research, or something.

Before everyone ran off to work, Red approached her at the breakfast table. “I know I can’t exactly see your face through the helmet, but you look like shit,” he teased. White just stared warily, causing Red to awkwardly cough and shift his weight. “Seriously, though, if you need another day to rest, it’s okay.”

White shook her head. “No, I’m fine. I’m ready to get back to work.” She couldn’t stand just laying in bed for another day. All she saw when she closed her eyes were the red flashing alarms that filled her vision before she collided with that window. No, busywork was better than that, no matter how much her body protested.

Red looked a bit relieved, and after a moment of awkward silence, he muttered a “goodbye” and left the Cafeteria. White watched him go, her head spinning. Something just seemed… off about him. He was acting way too friendly for the Red she knew. And there was also what Blue had said- that she should know better than anyone that Red was super kind. Did her accident flip some kind of empathy switch on him? It seemed unlikely.

White eased to her feat, brushing off Blue as they tried to help her. “I got it,” she mumbled, her joints creaking as she stood up. _Stars_ , she was sore. Breaking through a window did that to a person. She looked around, and was about to wander out of the Cafeteria when she noticed Yellow standing in the corner of her vision, shuffling his feet nervously and staring up at White. When he saw her notice him, he stumbled forward and rubbed the back of his helmet anxiously.

“H-hey, White,” he stuttered. “I haven’t had a chance to talk to you yet. A-are you okay?”

White stared quizzically. “Um, yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for the concern, Yellow.”

Yellow fidgeted with the control pack of his suit on his chest. “S-so you’re… not mad?”

“Why would I be mad?”

White didn’t understand what was making Yellow so nervous, but he melted with relief at her words. “T-thank you. I’m so happy to hear that. I’m so sorry, and I hope you get all better soon.” With that, he dashed out of the room, as if not wanting to push his luck and wait around for her to retract the statement.

White looked at Blue. “What was that all about.”

“Yellow is the one who accidentally flushed you out of the airlock,” Blue explained. “He bumped into the eject button during the crash. He feels so guilty, so thanks for forgiving him.”

White was more confused than ever. “He ejected me? B-but I flew out of the window.”

Blue laughed. “Well, I’m sure he’ll be glad to know that you didn’t even realize what happened.” They patted White on the back. “Go ahead and do some tasks. I’ll be in the Medbay all day if you need me, so don’t hesitate to come by if anything feels bad. And I mean anything.” Blue waved a scolding finger at White. “Doctor’s orders!” they called, and disappeared down the hallway and into the Medbay.

And then White was alone. The ship suddenly felt a lot bigger, and all she could hear air whistling through the halls and the distant bang of machinery. The Skeld had never felt so threatening, and the flashes of red lights behind her eyes didn’t help. White shuttered. “Get a move on,” she whispered to herself, and set off down the south hall.

The first room on the right was Admin, which seemed like a good a place as any to start some work. She shuffled over to the far edge of the Admin map and stared at the card swipe. _Easy enough._ She wrestled her wallet out of her suit pocket, and slid her ID card out and into the swipe slot.

_Shwoop_. Bad read. Try again.

White sighed in frustration.

_Shwoop_. Bad read. Try again.

Was her card busted? Maybe it broke in the crash. White tried the card a few more times, but no read. She groaned. _Great_. She put the card back in the wallet and slumped against the table. She had to tell Red that her card was broken. She wasn’t looking forward to that.

Deciding that staying in Admin was useless, she headed out of the room. There must be something she could do, just to feel useful if anything. Her feet lead her through Storage and down the east hall to Shields. She let instinct guide her: she had only been on the ship about a week before the crash, and didn’t entirely know her way around yet. Her head injury didn’t help; she kept bumping into boxes and tripping over wires she didn’t remember being there before, and the whole ship looked uncanny in her eyes. She thought briefly about turning around and going back to Blue in the Medbay, but quickly shook the thought away.

She found herself standing in Shields, the hallway leading up to Navigation looming in front of her. Her feet itched to keep going, to see Navigation again, but she was rooted firmly to the spot. Her heart pounded in her head, flashes of red behind her eyes.

“It’s just a window,” she muttered, but she knew that wasn’t entirely true. Her spine prickled where she had collided the day before, and her breath hitched.

All she could do was stand there, her thoughts a blank dissociation. She didn’t know how much time had passed when suddenly, the room filled with a harsh red light, and a shrill siren blasted through the halls. White immediately collapsed in on herself, panic coursing through her veins. _No, no, no, no_ , was the only thing she could think as the red alarm lights went off again and again.

However, the alarms only lasted a few seconds, and after a moment of silence, Red’s voice crackled over the speakers. “Ahem, sorry to call such a sudden emergency meeting on you all, but I have news on what we hit! Everyone please meet in the Cafeteria.”

White curled herself out of the fetal position she hadn’t realize she had fallen into. _Stars_ , why did that affect her so much? She had endured thousands of emergency drills during her space training at MIRA, yet one bad accident and she was completely immobilized. She took a few deep breaths, trying to calm the rush of panic and adrenaline still pumping through her. She was okay. “I am okay.”

At least no one had seen that. Especially not Blue.

White composed herself and made her way to the Cafeteria, and even though she was embarrassed, she took the long way in order to avoid Navigation.

When she arrived, she was the last one. Everyone else turned expectantly, and she flushed, rushing to the table and taking a seat.

Red clapped his hands. “Alright, now that everyone is accounted for, let’s get down to business.” He turned to Green, who was right beside him. “We have arrived to the scene of the crash. Green was in Navigation when we arrived, so I’ll give him the honors.”

Green preened under Red’s attention and straightened his back. _Was he always such a brownnoser?_ White wondered. “After scanning our surroundings and reeling in a few samples, we have determined that what we crashed into was...” He paused for effect, and in unison, the rest of the astronauts leaned in. White felt anticipation rise in her chest. Finally, a question would be answered.

“... another ship.”

The table immediately erupted into exclamations of surprise and questions, but Red held his hand up and everyone fell silent. White was in shock. “That’s not even the best part,” Red continued. “According to our scans and observations, it isn’t one of ours. Blue, why don’t you share your findings.”

White hadn’t noticed Blue sitting beside Red, fidgeting with a stack of documents. “Well,” they said slowly, “the ship was completely destroyed, but Green managed to find the body of a crewmate who must have been aboard that ship and reeled it in. I took a few samples, and, well, it turns out-“ They stopped, nervously looking at Red, who gave a nod of approval. “Well, it appears to be a completely alien species.” 

This time, there was no burst of excitement; only a chorus of gasps and a quiet “No way,” from Lime. White felt her body go numb. A different ship? Full of an alien species?? A species that must be just as advanced as humans, if they were also flying through space.

Red chuckled, breaking White out of her thoughts. “What a shame,” he purred, and his helmet clicked as he lifted the visor. There was a moment of confusion where White wondered what he was talking about, then a slick, black tongue slithered out from under the helmet. White felt her blood go cold. The window of the helmet popped all the way open, and she stared into the gaping maw of what she has previously thought was Red. His entire face was just teeth, the flesh gooey and black as tar, and he licked the fangs lining his giant mouth with his terrifying, barbed tongue. _No, no, no, no, no. What_ is _that thing?_

“We missed the opportunity to make some new friends,” Not-Red said. 


	2. Day 1: 10 Remain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which White makes some vital discoveries and decisions.

**Vitals:**

_Red: Alive_

_Orange: Alive_

_Yellow: Alive_

_Lime: Alive_

_Green: Alive_

_Cyan: Alive_

_Blue: Alive_

_Purple: Alive_

_Pink: Alive_

_White: Alive_

* * *

White couldn’t breathe. Her vision blurred, the only thing she could focus on being the grotesque alien visage of Red’s face. Static buzzed in her ears, tuning out the chorus of “Ugh, don’t be weird!” and “Red, you hypocrite, put your helmet back on,” from the other crewmates. All she could see was the endless circle of teeth that consumed the alien’s entire face, the slimy skin oozing around them. Sirens echoed in the back of White’s head.

That is _not_ Red.

She jolted backwards, launching away from the cafeteria table. She was hyperventilating, and everyone looked at her in concern. The playful ‘look’ left Not-Red’s ‘face’, and he immediately jammed his helmet back on. “White, are you okay?” he asked, and for a moment, White could have been fooled into thinking that she had imagined the alien in front of her. But no, now that she knew that this was not Red, it seemed obvious. His voice was different, stickier and sweeter, like raw honey. The real Red was rough and gravelly, sounding like the stone cold leader he is. _Was_ , White realized.

“Look what you did,” Lime teased. “You freaked her out with your ugly mug.”

Blue tapped Red’s shoulder and whispered nervously, “She isn’t fully... recovered from her accident. You said yourself that there are leaks and it’s not safe to take off the suits. I think you triggered a panic response by doing that.”

Red’s breath hitched. “Oh, White, I’m sorry, I didn’t think.” He stood up, about to approach White, but she stumbled back. Red hesitated, hurt by her fear, and before she could allow herself to feel sorry for him, she fled the Cafeteria.

At first she just instinctively sprinted east, but after a moment knew exactly where she had to go. Her footsteps echoed thought the metal plated halls of the Skeld as she slowed to a stop in front of the door to Navigation. Her heart was racing, both from the sheer panic of the situation and the running, and she felt her heart hiccup and her vision tint red. _No_ , she told herself, pushing the feelings away. Answers were what she needed. Her panic attack could wait. With a deep breath, she walked into Navigation.

The second she entered the room filled with glowing switchboards and beeping sonar, all she could focus on was the window. Not what was outside; she was still blind to that. No, all she saw was the clean, unblemished glass of the Navigation window of the Skeld. There was no breaks, no cracks, not even a scratch. She knew the window was impossible to replace out here in space, and she was surprised she hadn’t realized it before. This wasn’t the window she crashed though. Which meant… this wasn’t the ship she flew out of.

Only then did her vision focus away from the window pane itself and to what was outside it. Floating outside of the Skeld was the debris of another spaceship, completely destroyed but nonetheless recognizable. The nose of the ship turned into White’s field of vision, and there it was: the shattered front window of a Navigation room. Broken chunks and pieces of wiring that used to belong to her Skeld floated through space.

White finally accepted that the ship was beyond salvation, and everyone else aboard was dead.

 _Of course a spaceship wouldn’t be able to function if it’s front window was broken,_ she mentally berated herself. _Of course everyone died!_ _Stupid, stupid, STUPID White for believing that everything would be okay after you broke the biggest glass window on the ship. For thinking that everyone was alive even though if you used any critical thinking skills, it would be obvious that all of my crewmates, my friends, had asphyxiated in the crash when the window I broke flushed all the oxygen._ Tears welled up in her eyes, and White, after the worst day of her whole life, finally began to sob.

White knelt on the floor of Navigation for what felt like hours but was probably only a few minutes, her anguish pouring out of her in a sea of tears. She almost wished the salty water would fill up her helmet completely and drown her, but of course that didn’t happen; her face and clothes just got soggy. She cried and cried and cried, the well inside her feeling like it would never run dry, when a hand grabbed her shoulder.

White jumped up in alarm, bumping into the Navigation dashboard. Her whole body recoiled from the window pane, and she looked up to see Blue standing before her. The tears immediately stopped, and panic started up once more.

“It’s okay,” Blue reassured, though White wasn’t sure she could believe them. Blue took a step forward, but when White flinched, they stopped. “I know this is scary,” they said, “and the crash and your launch out of the ship is making you feel really panicked, but you have nothing to worry about.” They held out a hand. White didn’t take it. “Please come back to the Medbay. I want to help you. I want you to feel safe. You are safe.”

White was most definitely _not_ safe. If Red was a grotesque, horrifically slimy alien creature and no one but her was shocked about it, then everyone else on this ship was a terrifying alien too. Even Blue. Sweet, caring, lovable Blue was an alien too, with a spiral of razor sharp teeth ready to consume her lurking under that helmet.

And then White thought, _They think I am one of them._

As Blue stared at her in concern, she turned back to the window and looked out at the wreckage of her ship. The corpses of her fellow humans were in there somewhere, and so was the body of Alien White. The alien crewmates were only treating her with love and concern because they thought that she was their White, when in reality, the Alien White was flushed out of the airlock by Yellow in the collision, and they had picked up Human White, who had flown out of a window at the same time, by mistake.

She was an impostor.

Blue took another step forward, her hand still outstretched. White considered her position. Based on how terrifying and predatory Alien Red looked, she wouldn’t last a moment in a fight against them. Besides, they would probably be enraged if they discovered that she was not their White, but an impostor.

Also, humans and these alien creatures were indistinguishable with the spacesuits on.

If she wanted to survive, she needed to blend in.

She spared one last look at the destroyed human ship, choked back a sob, and took Blue’s hand.

Blue was gentle, leading her back to Medbay and easing her into her bed. White noticed on Blue’s worktable a tattered, lumpy red astronaut, and she quickly turned away. She couldn’t look at him right now. Blue tucked White under the sheets, whispered, “Get some rest,” in her ear, and left the room, leaving White alone with the corpse of Human Red and her thoughts.

* * *

She must have dozed off, because when White opened her eyes, the lights were off and the ship was silent. Blue was nowhere to be seen, and the body that was on the worktable was now gone. She crept out of bed and peeked into the hallway; it must be nighttime, or the outer space equivalent, because the alien Skeld was empty and dark.

The perfect time to put a plan into action.

She tiptoed down the hallway, into the Cafeteria and then south towards Storage. At one point she passed the bunks; she could hear snoring. She kept going, slowly and silently. She knew that when it came to her old ship, there was always at least one person awake throughout the night keeping watch, and it was probably the same here. It was most likely Red, the captain, who White wanted to see the least out of anybody, and because of that, she was careful.

She finally arrived at her destination: Communications. After quickly checking the room for people, she ducked inside and hurried over to the computer.

The screen blipped on, and White was greeted by a blinding blue screen filled by the the word ‘MIЯA’. White began mashing buttons with no clue what she was doing, and somehow managed to get the screen to load up a video call. _Yes_! She was getting in contact with somebody at MIRA, which meant she could figure out her next course of action.

The call buffered for a second, and then she was connected. At once, she froze. Looking at her from the other end of the call was another alien, black skin oozing as she mashed her face-consuming teeth. She wore a cute, prim blouse with a flower brooch, but the humanoid clothes didn’t distract from the fact that she was one hundred percent on call with one of the aliens. White felt bile rise in her throat. She pushed it down. _Play it cool._

“White?” the alien on the screen asked, cocking her head to the side. White realized that the creature didn’t have any eyes. _How could she see her?_ That was a question for another, less urgent time. “What are you doing? Where’s Purple?” the secretary alien on the call continued. “You aren’t supposed to initiate calls. Is something wrong?”

While gulped. She was not prepared for this. “Oh, um, yeah. I’m okay, it’s just… you were informed about the crash, right?”

The alien softened, sympathy somehow etched on her non-face. “Oh, yes, honey. I’m so sorry to hear that you got thrown out of the ship. That must have been very traumatizing for you.

“Y-yeah.” White didn’t want to think about that. “Did… Purple?…tell you about what we hit? Can you tell me more?”

The alien sighed. “I’m sorry, honey. It’s unlike anything we’ve ever seen before, and thus it is highly classified information. I’m sure you know more than most of us.” She looked earnestly at White through the screen. “I know that you’re upset by the crash and your little… accident, but we don’t have any answers right now. I’m sure Red will tell you as soon as he does.” The alien hesitated for a moment, then leaned forward. “Are you all right, White? You’re acting… different.”

Panic mounted in White’s chest. “N-no! I’m fine, I’m the same old me!! Uh, gotta go, bye!“ The alien began to protest, but White quickly disconnected from the call and the screen went back to its bright blue screensaver.

‘MIЯA’

White stared as she looked at the word. Of course the logo for this alternate alien space tech company had a reversed R. Mirrored. It was a bit too on the nose. A mirrored logo for a completely mirrored society to her own.

She turned to the computer again. Maybe, if she configured the communications settings, she could get in touch with her MIRA, and get help from humans. She pushed a few buttons, clicking through the settings, but it all read like gibberish to her. _Damn it_ , why did she never take tech classes back on Earth?? Human Yellow was the technician. If he were here, he would get them connected to Earth and MIRA and humans in no time flat. But he was dead, and the only one left was useless, bottom rung White.

She leaned back in the seat and covered her helmet visor with her gloved hands. Fear drummed in her head. The alien on the call had known something was off, and it was only a matter of time before the others onboard the ship did too. Once they found out, they would kill her for sure.

If she couldn’t call MIRA for help, the only way she was getting off of this hellship was to somehow fly away, and somehow get back to Earth. But there was no way she would possibly find another ship all the way out here, in the far reaches of space.

That is, except for the one she was already on.

But the only way she would be able to fly this ship home and not get caught by the aliens would be if…

If she took the ship by force.

She couldn’t take hostages. She was by far the smallest and least trained out of the crew, and the aliens had definitive advantages over her anatomy-wise. Which left only one option. She had to kill them.

She immediately felt woozy at just the thought of murder. White could never hurt a bug, never mind another person. _But these aren’t people_ , she reminded herself. _They are bloodthirsty aliens with razor sharp teeth and face-sucking mouths for heads, and if you want to survive, it’s you or them._

If life went on on this ship, someone was going to die, and White knew that she didn’t want it to be her.

She remembered what the alien on the call had said to her. Only Purple was authorized to communicate with HQ. Which meant that out of everyone, Purple was probably the only one who knew how to fully operate the communications. Which meant that if Purple found her out, every alien in MIЯA found her out.

In a sudden mix of self-preservation and fear, White jumped to her feet and grabbed a handful of wires, yanking them out of the machine. The computer monitor died as she tore at the wires and connecting bits, destroying the communications panel as much as possible. For the final blow, she lifted her boot and smashed it into the screen, cracking it right down the middle.

The carnage complete, White stared at the mess she made. In hindsight, this was obvious sabotage and probably wasn’t her best idea, but it was too late to go back now. Not caring to sneak quietly this time, she bolted from the room.

However, instead of going back to the Medbay, she turned into Admin. In Admin was a registry of every crewmember of the Skeld. She tapped at the screen, quickly pulling up the list of the crewmates, and scrolled down until she reached Purple. A little dot pinged on the holographic map of the Skeld that took up most of the center admin table, indicating Purple’s location as being in the bunks, asleep. White scanned Purple’s profile, and found exactly what she was looking for.

“Purple: MIЯA HQ Assigned Communications Expert. Tasks include: operating Communications. Has a private connection to MIЯA HQ at all times in case of emergency.”

She was right.

Purple had to be the first to go.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's a lil alien red concept i drew up enjoy :)


	3. Blood Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which White finds a knife and the knife finds Purple.

**Vitals:**

_Red: Alive_

_Orange: Alive_

_Yellow: Alive_

_Lime: Alive_

_Green: Alive_

_Cyan: Alive_

_Blue: Alive_

_Purple: Alive_

_Pink: Alive_

_White: Alive_

* * *

Desperation can drive anyone to murder, and White was no exception.

The next day she woke up, a silhouette of a plan in her mind and the anxiety of what was to come pulsing through her bones. Blue immediately informed her upon waking that Red had ordered that she stay in bed today. “He’s worried about you, you know,” they said gently. White just nodded numbly and curled deeper under the covers, and eventually Blue left her alone.

When she was sure that she wouldn’t be bothered again, White crept out of bed and began to rifle through Blue’s medical books. _Aha_ , Gray’s Anatomy. The book was nearly identical to its human counterpart, aside from the very obvious alien diagram on the cover. If there was any way to find out how to best get rid of these things, this was it.

She flipped through the book, glancing through the various medical diagrams and explanations of the body. _Huh, light receptors._ That explained the lack of eyes. The book said that the skin of these aliens was really sensitive to light, allowing them to see based on light bouncing off of their surroundings, all without needing eyes. _Fascinating_.

She kept scanning, pausing when she came across a particular drawing of the heart. If White didn’t know any better, she would have thought it was a human heart. She had never really studied anatomy in school, and even though she was sure there were differences, it looked identical to her own through her eyes. It was located in the same place, too. She shuddered.

The next few pages talked about the alien’s skin. She had thought it looked a lot like tar, and it turned out that wasn’t far from the truth. Their skin was naturally moist and squishy like that of a frog, meant to help them slide through tight spaces and escape predators. She didn’t dare to think about what a predator to these things looked like.

After studying the book for about an hour, she felt she had a pretty good grasp on how these aliens were built. Their anatomy was eerily similar to humans, except for the whole no-eyes thing, obviously. It was nauseating, the uncanny similarities.

The next step was finding the murder weapon, which was the part White had been dreading the most. Eventually, she couldn’t put it off any longer, and started rummaging through Blue’s medical tools in search of something surgical. There she found it: a large serrated knife, used for amputations. As soon as the grisly weapon was gripped in her hands, she could feel bile rising in her throat. It was heavier than it looked, the harsh artificial lighting gleaming off of the razor-sharp, jagged edge. She felt sick just thinking about the blade touching flesh, let alone shoving it into someone’s gut herself. _Them or me_ , she repeated to herself. _I have no choice. Them or me_.

She packed up the rest of the medical tools as discreetly as possible, and was about to get up to stash the knife under her mattress when the Medbay door slid open and Red stepped inside. White quickly hid the knife behind her back as Red cautiously stepped forward.

“Hey, White,” Red said, his voice wavering. He seemed… nervous. Like he was worried she would reject him. “I never got to say I was sorry about yesterday. It was a stupid joke, a horrible, dumbass bit that I thought would get some laughs and lighten the mood. I didn’t think, and I’m sorry I caused you to panic.” He shuffled his feet, and he wouldn’t meet her gaze. “I never want to hurt you.”

White was sweating bullets. Her grip felt sweaty on the handle of the knife even though she was wearing gloves, and she fought to keep a composed exterior. She could NOT let Red realize she was holding one of Blue’s giant knives. She didn’t dare speak, for fear that her weak voice would give her away, so she nodded, a little more enthusiastically than she meant to.

Red perked up, looking her in the helmeted face for the first time. “I-I’m glad you’re okay, White. I would never forgive myself if I caused something bad to happen to you.”

White swallowed hard. If only he knew.

His gaze drifted downward, lingering for a moment of the hands held firmly behind her back. He stared for a moment, and White felt her panic swell, her skin going clammy and her hands trembling on the knife hilt. But the moment passed, and he looked away, stepping backwards towards the door. “I can tell you want to rest. I-I’ll leave now. See you tomorrow?”

White nodded again, more violently than before. He looked at her concernedly, a confused frown evident in his body language. It seemed like he wanted to ask her something, or, even worse, like he was suspicious of her. “S-see you tomorrow,” she stammered, hoping to ease his suspicions of her. She had to lighten up, and not look like was about to commit a murder, even though she most definitely _was_ about to commit a murder and was in no way feeling light about it. To her relief, though, he seemed to relax at her response, and with a small wave, he left the room.

White exhaled, and brought the knife out from its hiding place. Her hands wouldn’t stop shaking, the knife quivering in her grip. She didn’t move, dreading that Red might come back, but after a few minutes of silence, the coast was clear.

Next and final step: find Purple.

White already knew exactly where Purple was: in Communications. There had been total calamity that morning when the trashed control panel was discovered, and White overheard through the Medbay walls that Purple and Yellow weren’t to be disturbed, as they were fixing things up in order to enable communication with HQ again. Another hiccup in White’s poorly thought out actions last night; now she had to get rid of Yellow, too. Hopefully she could just lure him away. The thought of more than one murder sickened her even more.

Thus, knife in hand, White left the Medbay to seek out her victim.

Her thoughts became a blur as she walked through the halls of the Skeld. _Them or me. Purple has to go first, then I’ll take care of the rest. Them or me._ Them or me. Everything around her felt like static, like she was walking through a haze. _Them or me. Them or me_ , she repeated, the mantra the only thing keeping her feet moving forward as she approached Communications.

White was standing outside the door, barely remembering how she got there but not caring. She peeked through the doorframe, and there were Yellow and Purple, their backs to her as they fussed over the destroyed monitor.

“I don’t know what to tell you, Purple,” Yellow said. “This wire right here is useless in this state. I need a replacement, which I don’t have!”

Purple let out an exasperated sigh and leaned back in her chair. “For a technician, you’re useless,” she complained. “Figure it out! I’m sure there’s a way to hot-wire it or something.”

It looked like Yellow was doing all the work while Purple just bossed him around. For someone who was a Communication’s expert, she didn’t seem to know how her own machine worked.

White watched them bicker and rearrange wires in a daze. _Them or me_ , she tried saying, but she knew that she couldn’t kill Yellow and Purple at once. Despite the desperate circumstances, her desire for sanity still clung to her. Besides, killing one would most certainly lead to being attacked and overpowered by the other. No, Yellow had to be lured away, and she knew just the way to do it.

White stumbled away from Communications and rushed down the hallway into Electrical. There, sitting in the middle of the room like a sleeping giant, was the circuit panel, where all the power on the ship was channeled. White flung open the giant panel advertising the yellow electrical symbol, and grabbed a fistful of wires. Another messy sabotage, but immediately the lights died and the entire ship went pitch black.

A burst of confused voices echoed through the ship, and she heard footsteps echoing down the hallway. _Shit_. It had been a miracle that she had avoided everyone so far, but that couldn’t end now. Especially since she was openly brandishing a knife.

However, her fears dissolved when there was a loud crash in the hallway, and a string of curses. “Shit, I can’t see,” the voice said. It sounded like Orange. “Is anyone else there?”

 _Right, they only can see through light!_ White remembered. If there’s no light to refract, they’re blind. Perfect. She poked her head out into the hallway. She could barely see in the dark, but there was still enough visibility for her human eyes to adjust to. She saw Orange leaning against the wall looking disoriented right outside of Electrical. Orange looked around, the sounds of other crewmates stumbling around in the dark heard all throughout the ship. She was listening for someone.

White took a step forward, and immediately Orange’s gaze snapped to her. White held her breath as Orange took a tentative step forward. “Who’s there?” Orange asked, her hands feeling around in front of her. “Are you in Electrical?”

White bolted. She sprinted down the hall, her footsteps clanging on the metal plated floors. “H-hey, wait!” Orange cried, and there was another crash as Orange stumbled forward and hit the floor. “Where are you going?”

White peeled through the ship, skidding to a halt in front of Communications once more. Yellow and Purple were still inside, grasping around for the walls.

“Go fix the power already! Some technician you are,” Purple grumbled.

Yellow hissed at her, “I’m trying! I can’t see a thing, let alone find the door.”

White kept as still as possible as Yellow inched his way out of the room. He stepped cautiously into the hallway, his face inches away from White’s, then turned towards Electrical and started slowly walking, his hands feeling out in front of him. He rounded the corner, and White was alone with Purple.

She stepped into Communications, and Purple turned to face her. “Yellow, is that you?” Purple asked, reaching out a hand to try and grab on to whoever was in the room with her. “Get out of here and fix the lights, you dimwit.”

White lifted her knife. Sweat was streaming down her face. Her face felt hot from the tears threatening to break loose. Her heart was about to blast its way out of her chest. “Purple,” she said, her voice shaking uncontrollably.

Purple stopped. “White? What are you doing here?”

White swallowed painfully. Adrenaline pumped through her system, and she felt like her eyesight was about to cloud over. She took another step forward. Her whole body was shaking now. She felt like she was outside her body, a shaken up soul watching as she stepped towards Purple one more time. The two, human and alien, were face to face.

“I’m sorry,” White rasped, and drove the knife home.

The blade made a squelching sound as she shoved it into Purple’s stomach. A wet substance splattered against White’s faceplate, obscuring her vision slightly. It didn’t matter. Pure shock and horror flooded her mind as Purple breathed out a small “Oh,” and hit the ground. She kneeled there a moment, her gloved hands trying to grasp the blade but slipping on the bloody hilt, before collapsing onto her back.

White jerked away from Purple, hitting the Communications wall. She was hyperventilating, her heart about to explode. _What have I done, what have I done, what have I done_ was the only thought she could think, imaginary red alarm lights flashing in the back of her vision.

It was then she heard it; labored breathing. She inched back towards Purple, who’s fingers twitched. White stopped breathing all together as Purple coughed, the sickeningly wet sound of blood gurgling out of her throat. “White,” she pleaded, her voice scratchy and full of fear.

White screamed, and before she knew what she was doing, White was on top of Purple, her knees pinning her to the ground as she grabbed the knife and thrust its serrated blade back into Purple’s body, again, and again, and again. She could barely hear the sound of Purple’s flesh tearing on the sawlike edge as she stabbed over and over again, until she lost count. Purple’s body spasmed, then went still.

The lights flickered back on, and White saw herself kneeling over the now completely dead body of Purple, both of them smeared with bright red blood. The knife had found it’s final home directly in Purple’s heart.

Panic gripped White, and she found herself running away from Communications. She ducked into the nearest bathroom, and she barely had time to tear off her helmet and reach the toilet before vomiting up the contents of her stomach.

She did it. She killed Purple.

Once she had completely emptied her stomach, she sat on the floor and leaned up against the dingy bathroom wall. The thought of putting her helmet back on in her frenzied, hyperventilating state seemed out of the question, dubious oxygen levels be damned. She closed her eyes and tried to ground herself, focusing on the feeling of her hair, torn loose by the removal of her helmet, sticking to her sweaty face, the nauseous feeling in her stomach, the cold tile beneath her body. She breathed, in, and out, in, and out, and at last she had calmed down enough to start cleaning herself up.

The first thing she noticed were her gloves, which were completely covered in sticky red blood. The sight of it was enough to almost reactivate White’s uncontrolled panic, but she forced it back down. She pulled off her gloves, the freezing air of the ship stinging her hands as she walked over to the sink and began to scrub.

The water was freezing, and luckily the blood was fresh enough that the cold water was able to loosen it and remove it from the plasticky material of her suit in no time. She was quickly clean, though sopping wet and cold. There was blood and little specks of vomit stuck in her long hair, but cleaning that out could wait. She watched the bloody water spiral down the drain, fighting to keep herself from freaking out once again. Red blood. The terror in Purple’s voice as she lay dying.

Suddenly, the speakers crackled, and White’s heart jumped into her throat. This time, however, instead of Red’s voice making an announcement, it was Yellow.

“Somebody, help!” he yelled into the speakers, his voice terrified. “Purple- Purple is dead!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyway jesus fucking christ amiright fellas?

**Author's Note:**

> jfc this is the first fic i've written since 2015  
> don't expect regular updates lol i have terrible writing habits


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